The First Fun One in DD

Tonight when I came home I reading through the blogs I regularly visit. A post on Unwrapping the Layers caught my eye. In it J talked about how some of the other women bloggers really made this DD thing seem easy, and she linked a couple of blogs in her post as examples. Imagine my surprise when I clicked on one of the links and found myself here! I make it look easy?

It made me really happy to think that I at least look like I've got this thing down pat, and it made me think about how much easier it really has gotten. In the beginning, everything was a struggle. One of the hardest things (for me anyway) was separating sex and discipline. When I first introduced the idea of DD, Nick was completely convinced (understandably) that this was all a big sexual game for me. So he told me very shortly that I could have it one way or the other. If I wanted spankings as part of sex, I could have them. If I wanted them for discipline, I could have those. But not both.

I was desperate for this to work, so I quickly agreed. And in the beginning, that was fine. The punishment "atmosphere" still felt so contrived, and I was so unused to actual discipline, that it was impossible for me not to be turned on a little, even when it really really hurt.

But eventually, the punishments began to feel real, and when I tentatively asked for spankings during sex, Nick was quick to point out that that was not the deal. Soon, all I had to associate with a huge part of my sexuality was disappointment and punishment. I was in a bad place for a few months.

Then we took a camping trip. At the time we were practicing regular maintenance spankings, and it happened to be the day of the week that they usually happened. I had mentioned it briefly before we left home for the campground, but he said we weren't going to deal with it right then.
That night, after our little girl was asleep in the tent, we sat in front of the fire and talked. Suddenly, he got up and led me to the picnic table. He bent me over it and pulled down my panties. He slipped inside me and made love to me. When we were finished, he asked me how many things I had on my list, and, a bit surprised by the sudden shift in topic, I answered that I had 30 swats coming.

He smacked my bottom a few times, and I tried to get up, afraid the campers across the lake would hear and investigate. He bent me back over, telling me what a naughty girl I'd been, and suddenly, I realized this was a very different type of spanking. It wasn't the longest play spanking I've ever had, but it was incredibly hot. The semi-publicness, the earthiness of the surroundings, the possibility of discovery all made the experience incredibly sexy. And I'd actually entertained a spanking/camping fantasy for a very long time.

That night was a turning point for us. We sat and had our first really frank discussion about where we were going with this whole DD thing, and we realized that it was possible to play with spanking without undermining the serious aspect of it. After that the pseudo-dom/pueudo-sub feeling fell away, and it began to feel less like a game and more like real life.

Hmmm...it's almost camping weather again.