I should be sewing...

Or at least measuring and cutting fabric. I have an Etsy order that needs to go out tomorrow afternoon, and another that I need to start on this weekend. But I'm so, so tired, and I can do it tomorrow. Right now I just want to hang out for a minute and write. Nick was out of state at school for work this past week. He left straight after work Monday afternoon and got home about 8:00 tonight (or technically last night now, I guess. Thursday.) It's always a mixed bag for me when this happens. Of course I miss him terribly, and having the kids by myself for 4 straight days without a break is always exhausting. (I know, millions of single parents do it every day - I'm just saying it's tough!) But it's good for him at work to get to go and learn new things for his job. And he gets to stay at a nice quiet hotel and have the company pick up the tab for really nice meals every night, and it's just a nice break from his every day responsibilities.

While he was gone my friend Elizabeth came over on Tuesday and Thursday. She has two little girls, one of them 4 weeks older than Jack, and the other about a year older than Daisy. She also has an older son, but he didn't come with her. Tuesday she had both girls, and she came a little while before Morgan got home from school. Daisy was spending the night at my parents' house, but the girls had fun with Morgan anyway. She was very sweet to them both, giving them mani-pedis, and when they got done Jack was anxious to play with them both.

Last month I did a thing in my Etsy shop where if you bought a roll of ribbon at the store of your choosing and gave it to me, I would make you a big bow from it, add an embellishment in the center and put it on a lined clip. There was no charge for me to do that, and in return I got to keep the ribbon on the spool. It was a way for me to get my ribbon restocked for free and for my customers to get bows at a discount since Hobby Lobby's ribbon goes on sale half off every other week. I had a number of participants, and I ended up with probably 25 or 30 new rolls of ribbon for my stash. Elizabeth is one of my very best friends, so that's kind of an ongoing arrangement with her, although really I will make her the bows even if she just brings me enough ribbon for what she needs made. So Tuesday afternoon I spent mostly making hair bows for her.

Thursday she came over pretty early, and we spent the whole day cleaning while Jack, Daisy, and her youngest daughter kept each other entertained. We got a ton done, although not quite everything I wanted. Other than the time with her on Tuesday and then church on Wednesday, I spent pretty much all my waking hours this week cleaning. I got most of my crafting stuff organized and condensed, although I still have some stuff on the table to go through and organize (but not as much!) I also got the rest of the kitchen cleaned, the bedroom and bathroom upstairs cleaned (although this was mostly maintenance), the couches cleaned (vacuumed out, Febrezed, and cushion covers all washed), and the laundry on the big chair in the living room folded and put away (this was a Hurculean task even with Elizabeth and Morgan helping). When Nick got home I had dinner ready and waiting on him. He passed out on the couch not long after eating, but I'm awfully glad to have him back home safe.

A few months ago Hobby Lobby had this gorgeous mustard yellow and charcoal gray rugby striped knit in their fall fabric line. I happened to come across it in the form of a remnant that was all that was left of their stock back in September. I loved it like a small child, but I needed a birthday gift for Kelly, so I made it into an infinity scarf for her. Ever since I've been kind of in love with that color of yellow, and more than a little bummed that I could never find any more of that fabric, even at the other Hobby Lobby in town. Last week Elizabeth came over with some hair bow supplies for me, including a couple of purses she said were stained and I could take apart for the materials. One of them was this purse:

I about died. I loved it! And I told her I was absolutely not taking it apart and I would be happy to make her hair bows from other stuff, but this purse was coming to live with me. There was a very faint, have to look for it, ink pen mark on the back, not at all noticeable, but she's very finicky about her purses. Any flaws at all and she passes them on. She was happy enough to let me keep it and enjoy it, and tonight I finally had the chance to change all my stuff over into it. I keep looking over at it and grinning like an idiot. I'm kind of a nut about purses/handbags, but they have to really catch my eye. I have several that I really, really love, including 3 or 4 that I've not even gotten to carry yet. They're all either gifts or were bought on extreme clearance ages ago, with the exception of two nice ones that were birthday gifts on separate birthdays. I tend to carry a purse for months at a time because I only buy ones that I really love, so once I start using one, it's hard to let go!

And now, because talking about my purses is making me happy, and I know you want to know (or if you don't just skip it), here are my favorites:

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Tyler Rodan Handbag, Simple Satchel

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I've got two more like the last one in different patterns that I haven't yet had a chance to carry. I've had them both for ages, but like I said, I have a hard time giving up what I'm carrying. Anyway. That's my randomness. Hope you all are doing well!

54 Things - The Meme

A few weeks ago Ronnie posted this meme on her blog. I'm a sucker for memes, and when I was younger I actually used to keep a regularly updated list of things that made me happy. So I thought it would be fun to revisit. :) And of course because I'm both wordy and nosy about other people's details, I plan to elaborate on them all. :) In no particular order, 54 things that make me happy:

1. Sleeping in. I don't get to do it often these days because Jack at least and usually Daisy too are up early, but it's awesome when it happens.

2. Naps. Along the same line, and just as rare, although Nick does generally let me take one on Sunday afternoons.

3. Spankings. Sometimes. Mostly after the fact because they make feel safe and loved and taken care of and reset. In the middle of them not so much, but I do love the end effect.

4. Sliding into a freshly made bed. I generally make our bed every day, even if Nick is away.

5. A clean house. I very rarely have one, but it's not from lack of trying.

6. Our church. A good deal of our church family is also our actual family, and I love it. I also love that because of this our kids are growing up close to their cousins.

7. Creating. My crafting is such a vital outlet for me, and on days when I'm crazy stressed it does wonders for me to plug in my glue gun and make one of the girls a hair bow or sit down at my sewing machine and sew up a little zipper pouch. Just creating something new and useful or beautiful is very cathartic for me, even (or especially) if it just takes a few minutes.

8. My children. I love all three of them more and more every day, and I can't believe God picked me to be their mom.

9. My husband. After almost 16 years of marriage he still turns my head, and I'm still head over heels in love with him.

10. The cabin. This is the little cabin on the lake that belongs to Nick's grandmother, and to his grandfather before he passed away. Nick and I honeymooned there, and for years we went back every June for a few days to celebrate our anniversary. For the last couple of years that vacation week has been spent at camp, but Nick gets three weeks vacation this year, and we're looking forward to spending time at the cabin again. Every year I feel like summer magically begins when we drive across the big green bridge on the way up there.

11. Church camp. I grew up going to church camp, and some of the best memories of my youth were formed there. Three years ago when Robert took his first group from our church to camp we sent Morgan and visited there every evening for the evening meal and service. The next year Nick stayed all week to help, and I visited. Last year Nick was a counselor, and I stayed all week in my own cabin with the two littles. This year's camp is just 15 weeks away, and I'm so excited!

12. Getting my nails done. It's been literally years since I've had my nails done (by which I mean getting lovely acrylics put on my short, stubby, square natural nails). I kept them done on a regular basis for years, but after Morgan was born it was only a sometimes thing. I think the last time I had them done was in 2007 for Kelly and Grant's wedding, but if we had the money I would keep them done all the time again.

13. Lists. I'm a list maker from way back. Grocery lists, Christmas gift lists, chore lists, project lists, they all make me feel a little safer and more in control.

14. Nick's voice on the phone. I try to not bother him at work unless I have a good reason because I know he's busy, but if I had my way I'd call him 6 times a day just to talk to him. When he calls me it brightens my whole day!

15. Texts from Nick. On the same theme, I love to get emails from Nick also, and I save them all.

16. Thrift stores. Shopping is a rare luxury for me, but when I do have any extra to play with, I love to go to the Goodwill. There's so much potential for great finds! Last time I went I found a real live genuine American Girl doll for $1! Someone has butchered her hair, but the price to get the head replaced is less than half the cost of a new doll, so it's still a fabulous deal!

17. Hobby Lobby, Joann's Michael's, A.C. Moore. We're very fortunate in my relatively small city to have four different craft stores (and two each of Hobby Lobby and Joann). Going to the craft store is one of my very favorite things to do, and if I have a gift card to spend guilt free it's even better!

18. Road trips with Nick. He kind of hates to travel, and I confess that it's less fun with fussing kids on board, but I absolutely love the rare occasions when it's just me and him in a car. We put Pandora on a 90s station and sing our hearts out.

19. Painted toenails. Mostly because I'm really bad at painting them, so if they get painted, it's because Nick does it for me, and I love it when he does that.

20. Pinterest. Stahp, Pinterest - I need to go to bed!

21. A good book. Nick got me a Kindle Fire HD last year, and I wasn't sure if I would enjoy reading on it like I do a physical book, but I love it just as much.

22. My children's laughter. Is there any sweeter sound in the world?

23. New socks. Something about nice, bright white socks makes me feel capable of conquering the world.

24. Yellow Box flip flops. I wear them every day of the year, even if it's just at home. 

25. Getting something for free. It doesn't happen very often, but I love it when it does.

26. Happy mail. I really, really love getting packages in the mail, whether it's something I ordered or a gift from someone.

27. Holding hands with Nick. Something so sweet and innocent, but it still gives me a thrill.

28. My time in the mornings playing with Daisy and Jack before we get up for the day. Both sleep in their own bed, but often Daisy wakes up when Morgan gets ready for school, and when she does she comes and gets in bed with me. Whether Morgan brings Jack up before she leaves or he sleeps later and I go get him myself, I always spend some times snuggling with both babies.

29. Hanging out with Morgan. She's reached the age where she likes to spend too much time shut in her room with Facebook, but when I can pry her out I enjoy her company.

30. Blue jeans. If there's any category of clothing I have an excess of, it would definitely be jeans, but I love them all.

31. Making someone a gift that they really love. 95% of the gifts I give are handmade, so the recipient's reaction is extra personal for me. And I really love getting gifts myself (especially handmade!), so I know how meaningful it is when someone goes to the trouble to find something that's just perfect for me.

32. Having nothing that I have to do. This NEVER happens, but it has in the not too recent past, and I'd love to have that feeling again sometime.

33. Photography. I really, really love taking pictures, and when I can get just the perfect shot it makes my whole day.

34. Taking my bra off at bedtime - ahh, heaven!

35. Finding out something is cheaper than I thought it was - the best thing ever at the checkout counter!

36. The way I feel after I finish on the treadmill. Unfortunately we didn't have enough left from the income tax return to renew my gym membership after all, but I don't have to pay anything till April 1st, so I'm hoping and praying we can come up with the money before then.

37. Spending time with a girlfriend. I've only got a few, and the days we get together are few and far between, but all the more precious for it.

38. Nick's weekends off. He works every other Friday and Saturday and is off on Sundays, which means that every other weekend we get 3 days together.

39. Seeing my husband proud of something he's accomplished. He's lost about 50 pounds, and though his weight loss has been stalled for a while, he has really changed his whole lifestyle.

40. The beach. I've only been a handful of times in my life, but I sure do love it.

41. Potstickers. Specifically the ones from Sam's Club. Soooo delicious!

42. Clean sheet day. With really soft, worn sheets. A number of years ago Nick and I found several great deals on high thread count sheets, and by now they feel amazing.

43. Squishy down pillows. Nick likes really firm, densely packed feather pillows, but mine have to be really soft.

44. Seeing family that lives out of town, whether they come here or we go there.

45. A fire in the fireplace. We don't do this very often, although we usually try to have one on Christmas morning.

46. Pepperidge Farm Milano Cookies. Most recently these Sweet Toffee Milano Slices. Ah-mazing!

47. Frozen Cokes. Probably my favorite treat, and occasionally Nick will bring me one unexpectedly. Just as romantic as flowers in my book. Not that I don't occasionally love flowers too. :)

48. Sweet tea. I'm pretty much awesome at making sweet tea thankyouverymuch.

49. That first really warm day of spring. You know, the one where you roll the windows down in the car and forget you ever saw snow.

50. That first perfectly gorgeous day with the delicious crisp bite of autumn in the air.

51. When Nick walks in the door in the evening. Seriously the highlight of my day, and about 5:30 every day I find myself watching the window.

52. Being a Stay At Home Mom. It has always been my dream, and I can't believe I'm so blessed.

53. On rare occasions Nick has spanked me purely as a reminder to be good, whether it's before I go somewhere or before he has to be away. It always leaves me feeling warm, fuzzy, loved, and taken care of, not to mention kept my mind on him the whole time.

54. This blog. It's not quite as active as it has been in some past years, but I love it, and I'm proud of it. I've met some wonderful people through it, and I'm so glad to know you all.

Chugging along...

It's been a while since I've posted, but it's just been so busy! We were snowed in, oh forever. Well, not really snowed in, but Morgan was out of school for almost a week straight, she had a friend overnight for several of those days, and it got a bit cabin-feverish. We did get our income tax return in on the 7th, which has been nice. We paid my parents back everything we owed them (for Daisy's dental work last year), took care of a few bills, and were able to get some things we needed. I'm planning to have another crafting slumber party for Morgan's birthday this year, so I got pretty much all the crafty supplies I needed for that. I also got to get an external lighting set up and a nice backdrop, which will be great for my photography! Nick had a few things on his list as well, such as his handgun carry permit, his next ASE testing registration, some new running shoes, and a new backpack. God always, always provides for us, but it's always fun when He provides a little extra. ;)

Monday night I got spanked. He told me Saturday night that it was coming. The plan was for it to happen Sunday night, but school was out for President's Day the next day, and Morgan had a friend spend the night. Nick didn't feel comfortable doing it with company in the house (nor did I), so he let me know he would deal with it the next night.

Monday night after all the kids were asleep he asked me to join him upstairs. I followed him up, then went into the bathroom to pee first. When I came out he had the Cane-iac Jr. with holes paddle in his hand.

The issue at hand was, as it always seems to be, the housework. I know it comes back to this time and time again. I've come to accept that it will probably always be somewhat of an issue for me, and though I really do make an effort, there will always come times when I need to be refocused and re-motivated. That was certainly accomplished with this spanking. I have no idea how many I got (well less than 100 I would think, but beyond that I can't guess). I do know that it was really, really hard to take right from the beginning, and I was no good at all at staying put for it. Finally, after telling me to bend over again 4 or 5 times Nick pulled down my jeans and panties. He told me that if I could stay put I would get 5 more, but if I moved again it would get a lot worse. Those last 5 were especially hard, and I've got a pretty bruised and sore bottom still a couple of days later.

But I feel better for having been spanked. I feel reconnected to my husband, and safe within his boundaries, and I've been getting more accomplished around the house. It's still far from perfect, but I'm working on it.

After the paddling we made love, something that doesn't always happen after a punishment, and he took his time making sure it was good for me too. Since then I've felt lighter and happier and just closer to him. 

Well that's been our last few weeks - how about you guys?